In this video, we hear from five Senior Pastors on what it means for the church, for parents and for the community to extend God’s grace and truth to people who identify as LGBTQ.

Time Stamps:
0:00 – Introduction
1:51 – Have the Church done well in engaging the LGBTQ community?
7:57 – How can the Church engage the LGBTQ community better?
15:47 – How can parents of children with same-sex attraction respond?
18:30 – Addressing the silence of some churches pertaining to same-sex attraction matters.
22:53 – Will the church be willing to run together with those who struggle with same-sex attraction?
27:22 – How should the church view people with same-sex attraction?

This “Ask Me Anything” episode presents interesting perspectives on the need to discuss sexuality in our homes. Find out more about how and why we can talk about this culturally pressing topic with our children. Parents will find this episode especially helpful.

TIME STAMPS
0:50 – How and when would you talk to your child about sexuality?
2:12 – How did you talk to your children about sexuality?
7:00 – How can churches and parents be a safe space for children to understand their sexuality?
9:00 – How do you define a safe place?
9:43 – Should children have the freedom to explore their gender and sexual orientation?
13:27 – Was same-sex attraction a developmental phase for you?

This “Ask Me Anything” episode digs into uncomfortable questions about the Church and its engagement with Christians with same-sex attraction.

TIME STAMPS
0:00 – Introduction
0:33 – Why did you share your story?
1:10 – How did overcoming same-sex attraction look like?
2:01 – Did you continue to struggle or was it a complete turnaround?
3:53 – As a Christian who used to struggle with SSA, what is your end goal?
4:53 – Is it difficult for pastors to talk about SSA to their churches and communities?
9:43 – What would you say to Christians with SSA who want to come to church?
11:17 – Why are churches talking about homosexuality when there are so many other issues to address?
14:44 – How can Christians with SSA help the Church to become a safer place?

In this series of “Ask Me Anything” episodes, we invited representatives from both groups to come together so that we can better understand and empathize with one another. Join us as we explore how we can make the Church a safer place for people with unwanted same-sex attraction.

TIMESTAMPS
0:00 – Introduction
1:30 – Were there things that were said in church that didn’t help you?
2:13 – How did their acceptance look like?
2:36 – What were your emotions before and after coming out to your church mates?
3:08 – How should a pastor respond when someone comes out to them?
3:51 – How would you respond to someone who comes out in your church?
7:50 – How should a young person bring up LGBTQ issues to a senior pastor?
10:20 – What would your end goal look like in terms of relationships and sex?
11:04 – Is celibacy the way for those who are not attracted to the opposite gender?
16:19 – What would you say to someone who has been hurt by the Church?

She learnt that she was never forsaken. Even when it seems like no one else notices her or cares about her, Mabel knows she is loved and accepted. She found true freedom to love, and be loved. How about you?

Who accepts you? And what gives you hope? What do you do when depression seems to always be an unwelcome companion. And when loneliness and rejection are too much to bear, who can you turn to?

If you’re struggling with depression and suicidal thoughts, know this. You are not a victim, you are stronger than you know. You are wanted and you are loved. Don’t just come out, come home.

Listen as 4 Christians who used to struggle with same-sex attraction share about their journeys out of depression and suicidal thoughts, and into joy. Like them, you can overcome too.

Like… What would you say about a church leader who teaches that God permits homosexuality? What about pastors who’re silent about this issue? Or what about churches who’re always trying to “fix” those with same-sex attraction?

Along with other pressing questions, let’s talk about how to make the Church a safer place for people to come home to.

#TrueLoveIs

For over 10 years, Raphael looked for casual sex and gay relationships to deal with the loneliness in his heart. But God met with him and started to turn his life around. Watch how Raphael learnt to trust God’s good and life-giving plans for his life.

Homosexuality is multi-faceted. It involves many aspects: desires, behaviour, orientation, and identity.

Homosexual desires: Feeling emotional and/or physical desires for people of the same sex.

Homosexual behaviour: Acting on one’s emotional and/or physical desires for people of the same sex. For example, pursuing a same-sex romantic relationship or being involved in same-sex sexual activity.

Homosexual orientation: Experiencing a persistent pattern of emotional and/or physical desires for people of the same sex.

Homosexual identity: Identifying as a gay, lesbian, or bisexual person.

The term “homosexual” is used to describe a person who in adult life has an enduring, definite and preferential erotic/sexual attraction to members of the same sex and who usually engages in overt sexual relations with them.¹

The term “gay” is typically used to describe homosexual men and “lesbian” to describe homosexual women.

Contrary to popular understanding, homosexuality is not so much driven by sexual needs...

Contrary to popular understanding, homosexuality is not so much driven by sexual needs as it is driven by a (conscious or unconscious) desire to be loved and to love another person, especially of the same-sex.^{2, 3}

Endnotes

Teach your children a simple, four-part story of our world: God made a good world; people did not obey God and sinned; God forgives, saves and transforms those who follow Jesus Christ; and He will gloriously remake us and this world.

When children take in and process new information, they start from what they already know, connecting new information to their previous knowledge.

When children take in and process new information, they start from what they already know, connecting new information to their previous knowledge. Before your children are even aware of homosexuality, begin by giving them a biblical view of the world.

In other words, you are framing the issue for them by teaching them about God and His redemptive plan for humankind. You are providing your children with a basic understanding of the world in which we live. We always want to start with what’s good when talking about difficult subjects, so we begin by teaching about God’s plan for us and our sexuality. That gives us a foundation for then discussing any problem issues.

Find a good children’s Bible or Bible storybook and read it with your child. As they grow and learn, this framework provides the starting place for discussing issues such as homosexuality.

Creation

The Fall

Redemption

Glorification

Use simple Bible stories, such as the Creation story, to show how God made Adam and Eve for each other and created the first marriage.

Use simple Bible stories, such as the Creation story, to show how God made Adam and Eve for each other and created the first marriage. Use the story of Noah to show the animals, two-by-two, male and female, going into the ark. A mommy animal and a daddy animal together have a baby animal.

Also use examples from life to teach these truths, explaining, for example, that Mom and Dad were married—marriage is a good gift from God. When a child sees something bad, you might explain how sin brought pain into the world. When your children start noticing that boys and girls are different, use that to talk about God separating humanity into male and female. Life is full of such teachable moments!

Real-Life Scenario

Your family is spending time together during the school holidays. As you enjoy the sights, you notice that a gay pride event is taking place nearby. Your family starts to see same-sex couples holding hands. Your young son or daughter asks, “Why are those two men holding hands? Why are those two women kissing?”

Possible Responses

These depend on the age of the child, his or her level of concern about this scenario and his or her verbal and abstract ability:

Word Of Caution

At this age, you aren’t talking to your children about specific sexual activity; they’re not equipped to handle adult sexuality. Furthermore, we suggest waiting until kids are older before introducing terms such as “homosexuality,” “heterosexuality,” “gay,” “straight,” “LGBT” or any of its variants.

In addition, we also suggest not saying something like, “Those men are gay. Gay is when two guys like each other.” That’s confusing to boys, who at this age are developing a stronger internal sense of masculinity—primarily through distancing themselves from girls and identifying with and relating to other boys and men.

It’s very healthy and normal for a boy to have older boys and men who function as heroes or role models. Explaining homosexuality as “two guys who like each other” could prompt a young boy to doubt himself or his own feelings. He might think to himself, “I’m a boy and I like boys. Does that mean I’m gay?” Some children have come home from school lessons on homosexuality and asked this very question.

The same would absolutely apply to girls. We suggest you avoid such statements as, “Being homosexual or lesbian is when two girls like each other.” This takes what is a normal, healthy developmental stage—girls liking and connecting with each other or following older girls as role models—and equates it with homosexuality.