11 Mar 成为社群: Pastor Ian and Joseph
“If guys in church knew that I liked the same sex, I’d become a total outcast. And if my family knew, they’d definitely kick me out.” That was my thoughts as a teenager, wrestling with the tensions of my experience with same sex attraction.
So, whenever I suspect that anyone was close to finding out my secret, I’d uproot and leave that community.
“Did anyone notice my effeminate hand gesture?”
“Omg, did I just let out that slightly higher pitched laugh?”
“Was I too friendly? Does anyone suspect that I like guys?”
This cycle continued for a decade until it became a burden too heavy to bear. This was when I knew that I had to speak to my fears and break the cycle. My constant act of worship unto the Lord was to “come home AND stay home”, to not run away because of my fears but to face it.
Slowly but surely, I came out to my community. They held space for me in my pain, and rejoiced with me in my victories. They valued me not for my struggles, but who I am. And for that, I am thankful.
You can find the link to Joseph’s personal story here.