30 May 4 Ways to Relate to a Friend with a Different View on Homosexuality

1. A sincere and humble attitude
This is a prerequisite to any discussion that you might have about your opposing views. Your friend may be experiencing same-sex attraction, and he or she may have tried to “change” his or her same-sex desires in the past, but those attractions persisted. Or your friend may be heterosexual and he or she witnessed homophobia and discrimination happening. Extend understanding towards their circumstances.

Don’t “win” the argument at the expense of losing the relationship.

2. Willingly listen to their point of view
Ask questions in a calm and gentle manner. Avoid being hostile and defensive, or aggressively arguing your beliefs. Your role or responsibility towards them is not to change their mind or ways. Don’t “win” the argument at the expense of losing the relationship. It is possible to maintain your stand against homosexuality without losing a “pro-gay” or gay/lesbian friend.

3. Acknowledge that neither party has all the answers
Prepare to respond to revisionist interpretation of key bible verses that refer to homosexuality. Stay flexible when discussing theories (e.g., biological basis of homosexuality or ability to change sexual orientation), yet firm when discussing your convictions. Be aware of the complex issues within the discussion.

...show them love by demonstrating acceptance and grace.

4. Offer genuine friendship
Instead of focusing your energies on arguing that they are morally or ideologically wrong, show them love by demonstrating acceptance and grace. They may expect you to dismiss or betray them at some point because of your differing stand. Show them unwavering love in such a way that even when you disagree with them on certain issues, they are still assured of your love toward them.